The Deer Family

Two years ago, as Jason, Carter and I were wandering around Coscto, Carter asked me to go look at the Christmas decorations with him. Before anyone gets all wound up about it, I'm completely on board that Christmas decorations should not be out in September, but on the other hand I don't really care when anyone wants to start decorating their home for Christmas. Whatever makes you happy.

Anyway, two years ago in Costco Carter saw the Christmas decorations and wanted to look. As we walked the two aisles of Christmas decorations (in September . . . ) Carter got very excited. "Momma, look at the deer family. The deer family is our family! It has a momma deer, a daddy deer, and a baby deer. It's us!" Carter was so earnest in his excitement over the deer family being just like our family his enthusiasm was contagious. When we walked back over to the Grinch Jason, I told him about Carter seeing the deer family and how overwhelmingly excited he was about the deer family because it was just like our family.

The Grinch Jason immediately struck down the idea of the deer family. He had a litany of reasons as to why we were not going to purchase the deer family that day. It was wrong to buy Christmas decorations in September. He didn't like the deer family. He didn't want to have to set up the deer family and make sure all the lights worked. We didn't buy the deer family that year.

Fast forward about a year and we are wandering through Costco again. For those that don't know this, Costco is Jason's happy place. He loves Costco. It's early October 2017 and there are two aisles of Christmas decorations set up. Like any happy child, Carter sees the Christmas decorations and wants to go look at them, so Carter and I find ourselves walking through the Christmas aisles again. For a second year in  row Carter spots the deer family. "Momma! Momma look! The deer family is back. Our family is back!" Yet again I found myself caught up in Carter's contagious enthusiasm.

We go find the Grinch Jason and this time I have more resolve. "The deer family is back this year. We should buy one today." The Grinch Jason launched into his list of reasons why he didn't want the deer family, but I didn't back down. Finally he  grudgingly said, "we can't buy the deer family today because the box is too large to fit in the car. We can buy it on our next trip and we'll bring the truck." I told him the deer family would be sold out by our next trip, that's how these things work at Costco, and we should buy it today and have them hold it for pickup. Jason wouldn't budge. Just as I predicted, the deer family was sold out for the season on our next Costco trip. The Grinch Jason didn't try very hard to hide his satisfaction that, for a second year in a row, he had escaped owning the deer family.

Fast forward to December 2017, the week before Christmas, and Jason, Carter and I are in Canada to visit his family. It was after dark when we landed at the Toronto airport, so I told Carter we should look at Christmas lights and try to spot deer families on our way to grandma's house. This immediately put the Grinch Jason in a grumpy mood. He snaps at me, "Christmas lights are an American thing. You aren't going to see very many. And you won't see any deer families." I think he might have even slipped a "Bah, humbug!" in there somewhere.

Despite Jason's warnings of no deer families and Christmas lights being an American thing, Carter and I saw lots of Christmas lights and a couple of deer families on our drive to his mom's house. The next evening, as we were driving to a restaurant with his mom and his aunt, I told them that Jason had informed Carter and I that Christmas lights were an American things and that deer families would not be found in Ontario.

Fortuitously, we drove through a large subdivision at that point. The houses were decked out in Christmas lights, I  mean Clark Griswold style Christmas lights. We started playing a game I called "scream out deer family every time you see a deer family." The Grinch Jason moved from annoyed to angry as everyone in the car repeatedly screamed out, "deer family!" every time we saw one. I lost count of how many deer families we saw. At least 50 on our relatively short drive. The Grinch Jason was ready to cancel Christmas by the time we arrived at our destination.

Fast  forward to October 1, 2018. Jason is making a solo trip to Costco. We hadn't gone to Costco in three weeks because we have been crazy busy, and no one had any time for Costco trips. Jason was becoming more and more difficult to live with as his Costco withdrawals worsened, so I finally told him to take a half day off and go to Costco and rejuvenate himself.

Apparently Jason's Costco trip was truly revitalizing and food for his soul. He texted me from Costco, "the deer family is back." First of all let's give the Grinch Jason three cheers for sending me that text. I wasn't there and I never would have known. I texted him back, "buy it NOW." Finally the Grinch Jason decided to make the right choice and embrace the spirit of the deer family. He managed to cram the box into the trunk of our car. When Carter and I came driving up to the house on the Kubota RTV as Jason returned home from his Costco trip, Jason pulled the box with the deer family out of the trunk. Carter started screaming at the top of his lungs, "the deer family!! The deer family. Momma, he brought home our family. MOMMA DO YOU SEE THE DEER FAMILY??!!"

Just in case you think Jason had a complete change of heart and ate his Christmas feast with the Whos in Whoville, this is what he posted on Facebook after purchasing the deer family:

1. It's October 1st.
2. It's 85 degrees outside. There is no hint of colour in any leaf on any tree.
3. The only thing it's going to do in our ten day forecast is get warmer. I'm seriously contemplating a swim in the redneck pool.
4. It makes me angr/y/ier and (even more) volatile when stores are two seasons ahead of the calendar. 
5. I argued against the purchase of the lighted reindeer family last year because I thought the whole concept was *way too redneck*. And as anyone who knows me will readily attest when I say something is too redneck for my taste that is really saying something.
6. I think Christmas is seriously over-hyped and overly commercialized.
7. I've ranted at length on each and every one of these topics.

So, what did I do when I saw the reindeer family at Costco today? I texted Melissa who texted me back that I should purchase them immediately. So I bought them and shoved them in the trunk. And here we are. I own Christmas decorations that I bought voluntarily in late summer. Maybe I'll plug them in just to see if they light up."

Welcome home deer family!

Maisie and Calimba grooming

Sebastian

Gibson and Flyer

Cisco, Homer, Trigger, Levendi and Thomas

Maggie and Dolly

Missy

Nemo and Paramount

Cuffie and Traveller

Calimba and Charlotte

Norman and Maisie

On Being a Horse Husband

(post written by Jason) I had the pleasure of meeting a new client recently when he brought one of their family horses here to retire. By way of introduction he said, "I'm a horse husband." I told him I understood completely and that I too was a horse husband. I'll expand on what that means in terms that I think a lot of horse husbands will understand. 

Melissa lives to fool with horses and she absolutely will turn her life inside out in order to give herself the ability to ride. I can't pretend I understand....and I certainly don't pretend to match..... her obsession with all things equine. Don't get me wrong, I like horses and enjoy tending after them here on this farm. We have a nice life and a great lifestyle because Melissa and I were able to meld our passions for horses and farming. The difference between Melissa and I is that when I have leisure time (a rare thing) I like to do things that have absolutely nothing to do with horses, or for that matter with farming.

It's taken me years coming up on decades to understand that while Melissa usually humours these non-horse and farm related pursuits, what she really wants to do during any free time she might have is ride/groom/otherwise fool with horses. If Melissa could choose between a non-horse related five star European vacation OR spending every day we would be away on vacation attending a horse show there is absolutely no doubt in my mind which she would choose if left to her own devices. (Melissa here. If you offered me a five star European vacation I would go. I would go to the horse show another time. Really.)  In the first years of our marriage, in a moment of utter frustration with this budget busting, time consuming, LIFE consuming habit I MAY have likened it to a form of brain damage! I also may have used four letter words in my description! Fortunately I understand things better today than I did at that time in that I now know where I rank in the grand scheme of things. Husbands are easier to replace than horses. Cheaper too.. More on that in a minute. 

Unfortunately for Melissa the last few years have not been kind to her personal horse habit. Between having to retire her own horse, euthanizing her other young horse, being a wife and mother, and running the farm, riding came to a complete stop.  Suffice it to say that she absolutely understands what it's like for one of our clients to have to retire a horse due to unsoundness and at an early age. She also understands what it's like to have to make the call to have her own personal horse put down years ahead of his or her projected expiry date. She understands that one of these events, possibly combined with other life events, mean riding gets put on hold for a long time. And I, dear reader, have learned what it's like to be a horse husband to a dejected, and at times heartbroken, wife with non-stop horses on her brain. 

After five years completely away from riding Melissa started talking about easing back into the saddle a few months ago. We talked about budgeting time and money toward a horse and all the many things that come with them. We don't have a lot of leisure hours and finding time for Melissa to ride is a real challenge for us. In all this I remained supportive. (Melissa here. I would like to rephrase this. In all of this you eventually resigned yourself to being supportive). 

A few weeks ago, thanks to one of our longtime clients, Melissa lucked into a good deal on a youngish horse that she thought would fit the bill for her new riding schedule. Within seconds of the horse's arrival at the farm she had ordered him a custom saddle.....English riding but also...ahem......made in England. You know, England, where labour and leather are both cheap. That England. Within minutes she was talking about going to Florida, and not with me or Carter either, for some training this winter. For all this stuff I've remained fully supportive, which is the preferred role of a horse husband. (Melissa here again. Jason has remained supportive, but I cannot let our dear readers live with the fallacy that he's been pleasant and in continuous good humor about everything. This has happened at times, at other times he has to work his way to pleasant and good humor).

You'd think after thirteen years together I'd have this habit figured out by now. After all, I'm in the business. I hear and talk to and deal with a lot of horse husbands and horse spouses when they visit. You'd be wrong. A month after the arrival of horse number one, Melissa asked me about purchasing horse number two. And that's when I temporarily lost my shit. I used foul language.. I *may* have even used the term *brain damaged* when I referred to her lifelong obsession with this time consuming, money consuming, LIFE consuming habit. And the absolute bugger of it is that she didn't even try to refute me. Horse #2 arrives at the end of next month. By that time I'll be back to supportive, at least until the surprise arrival of horse #3. (Melissa here again - there is NO plan for horse #3. NONE. I promise. For now.)

King (Cisco behind him)

Johnny, Ripley and Toledo

Cisco and Levendi being wild before breakfast

Duesy and Bruno

B-Rad and Blu

Nemo and Sebastian

Renatta and Norman

Calimba and Charlotte

Lofty, Gibson and Romeo

Dolly and MyLight

Traveller, Lily and Renatta

 Sabrina, Sparky and Timbit waiting for breakfast

new resident Quigly

Quigly and Happy

Nemo and Quigly

Quigly enjoying the retired life

(Not) Winning at Life

Jason and I have not been winning at life lately, and I am currently winning our race to the bottom. A few days ago we were stocking up at Costco. Several aisles of Christmas decorations were prominently on display. I'm with all of you saying we shouldn't have Christmas decorations yet, but regardless they were there and Carter wanted to look at them. Carter and I went to look at Christmas decorations while Jason and our cart went to a different part of the store. 

Carter and I studied all of the Christmas decorations and I seriously considered buying a lighted deer family for our front yard. I know it sounds tacky but in person I actually liked them. I decided to pass on the deer since they box would have no chance of fitting in our car. At that point Carter and I found Jason and our cart and we continued with our shopping. We were in the produce section getting ready to put a couple of packages of blueberries in our cart when Jason freaked out. 

Jason:  What the heck? What is this? What is going on?

Me:  completely clueless as I watched Jason have a meltdown in Costco

Jason:  This is not our stuff! This is not our stuff!

Me:  I looked at our cart and recognized nothing. "Jason, where did you get this cart?"

Jason:  I don't know. I thought I was pushing our cart around but I'm not. 

Me:  Where did you get distracted? Where is *our* cart?

Jason:  I have no idea, but this isn't our cart. 

Me:  Jason, we all see this is not our cart? Where do you think you started pushing the wrong cart?

Jason:  I have no idea.

After that exchange Jason left somebody else's cart out in one of the main aisles hoping they would see it. Then we went and got a new cart and started over. I felt very badly for the person who had turned their back to look at something then turned around to realize their cart was gone. 

Apparently I felt the need to outdo Jason's lack of situational awareness. I loaded my horse on the trailer and drove to a friend's farm to go trail riding. As I was turning into her driveway and felt the drop on the left and then heard the thud, I remembered she had told me to be careful of the steep drop off on one side. So of course that was the side of the driveway I was on. 

The gooseneck of my trailer briefly hit the left side of the truck on the bed. Our truck is now sporting a nice lowered area on the top left side of the bed. The truck is otherwise perfectly fine, but the cosmetic effect is quite ugly. Jason took the truck to the body shop today to get an estimate on repairing the bed. It will go in next week and come out with an undented bed for $1600.  I have been driving a truck and trailer since I was 16 and have never had an incident of my doing ever, until yesterday.

Sometimes you're the windshield, yesterday one part of the truck bed definitely looked like the bug. Oops. Hopefully one of us will manage to do something brilliant in the near future to make up for for our absent-minded professor moves of the last few days. 

________________________

Gus and Sushi running through the rain . . . 

. . . Gus, Sushi and Squirrel

Lighty

Blu

Nemo

We had some egrets visit us on Tuesday. We see some a few time a year. Silver is surrounded by our visitors.

Gibson being followed by the egrets; any time we've seen egrets they are always following Gibson around

a closer look at some of our visitors

Flyer and Gibson; if you look very closely you can see the egrets all perched on the fence behind them . . . 

. . . I zoomed in for a better picture

Johnny and Happy

Lighty and Miel

George and Asterik were very  happy they had something other than dirt to roll in

more of the grey horse club looking a little brown; Asterik, Silver and Gus

Lotus

Cino and Fabrizzio grooming

Baby and Revy

Irma, Hawk Encounter, De-Worming

We had a visit from Irma over the last two days. We were told by the weather forecasters repeatedly that we were going to see a couple of inches of rain and sustained winds of 35mph. 35mph winds are laughable to those who experienced Irma at her worst, but still not something we typically see here. The occasional gust during a thunderstorm yes, but sustained, no. We put our porch furniture in the garage, I took down some of the big fly traps, and we generally relocated anything that was susceptible to being blown away.

Apparently Irma hit some much cooler air as she was working her way through north Georgia, and thanks to that she was nothing but a rain shower by the time she moved into middle Tennessee. We got almost two inches of rain through steady, soft rain over the last couple of days, but we never got so much as a puff of wind. I could have left a napkin on the ground and it wouldn't have blown away. Since Irma had already caused enough damage and destruction I was thankful the wicked witch had melted by the time she made it to Tennessee.

In other news Ewen, in a classic Ewen move, decided to face off with a hawk today. We've all seen this hawk sitting on the fence in various places around the farm several over the last couple of months. The hawk was fine, we saw him walk and fly, but he was clearly very focused on hunting some rodents and he was sitting on the top of the fence. Ewen kept running at him barking, and the hawk held his ground on the fence at first. But when Ewen wouldn't let it go he decided to come down and face off with Ewen.

As is Ewen's way, he was completely oblivious to the fact that he was about to take some talons or a sharp beak to the face. After screaming his name until I was hoarse (I'm still hoarse a few hours later for that matter), Ewen reluctantly gave up his game with the hawk and followed us to the house.

Ewen not processing this is a stupid move; this is happy stance with his tail up and smiling

all of the human screaming made Ewen finally start to question if this was a good idea or not . . . 

. . . back to tail up and smiling. "Why are you screaming at me??" . . . 

. . . after one last attempt at play Ewen finally gave up and came with us

we see this hawk around frequently, it likes to perch on the fences

After we finally got Ewen to leave the hawk alone and follow us we returned to our activity already in progress which was de-worming. While Irma visited yesterday we had a farrier here in the morning and the horse dentist here in the afternoon. Today it seemed like a good day to de-worm as the horses were too wet to do any grooming. Once the hawk encounter finally ended we went back to shoving tubes in horses' mouths. Just another day on the farm. 

Wilson and Sushi were being playful

Cisco and Levendi grooming

Moe, Homer and Revy (Baby in the background)

Johnny and Rubrico were playing

Sushi and Rubrico

Roho and Gus

Levendi and Moe

Walden and Fabrizzio

Timbit and Ewen

Johnny, Mick and Lighty

how Gibson felt about eating de-wormer . . . 

. . . Donneur wasn't fond of the taste either . . . 

. . . Wilson was in agreement

Renatta and Charlotte were hoping to find something better than tubes of de-wormer

Norman and Traveller

Chance

King having a great roll . . . 

. . . and shake

apparently this corner of the pasture was only for black or white horses; Blu, B-Rad, Nemo and Paramount

Lighty and Nemo

Mick and Taco

George rolled (Gus behind him). . . 

. . . and Gus joined him

Gibson and Cocomo

Donneur and Lofty